Crossroads 2018: The PROOF of the pudding…

“To state the facts frankly is not to despair the future nor indict the past.”
~ John F. Kennedy ~

Written, Edited and Presented by
Tim

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen,

You know, there’s a simple phrase that resounds, and echoes, throughout the modern culture on a VERY, annoyingly, regular basis – “Prove it…!”

Usually it’s in reference to a person claiming this, that, or the other about their Vampirism but there’s a place, and time, when it should be used and it should be used properly.

Accusations of misconduct, or misdeeds, are part and parcel of the modern Vampire culture and I guess we have to expect that when somebody gets upset with someone else. Calling people names like “paedophile”, “child molester”, “sexual predator”, “rapist”…well, that’s all well and good and, if there is evidence of conviction in a nationally, or State based, Sex Offenders Registry then it is justified and warranted BUT, and here’s the big “but”, if you have no proof for making said accusation, if you can’t support the claim with rock solid, incontrovertible and legally sound proof then you are committing an offence under the law and that, dear reader, gets you a black mark in the culture.

What’s the black mark? Well, you may get the title “Drama Queen”, you may get a name for yourself as a troublemaker and end up getting ignored, or shunned, by the mainstream culture. What’s worse, in this writer’s opinion, is the clear indication that you have no self-respect or dignity and therefore are clearly indicating that you should not be taken too seriously.

If you do it once you might get away with it by claiming you were in a bad mood, claiming your pet guppy passed away, claiming you had a bad day at work but if you persist and spread the poison far and wide then you will get a name as a douche and no one will take you seriously anymore. Now, you can sit back and say, “I don’t give a rat’s…” That’s fine, that’s your prerogative but the very fact that you don’t give a damn about anyone else reflects very poorly on YOU and, worse still, it reflects badly on people you call friends.

Take a look at this;

Img. source: Facebook

A most enlightening meme indeed and one that shows, step by step, how to avoid falling into the “Idiot” hole as you mingle.

Perhaps I could add another, “Never try and support your insupportable argument by yelling louder and getting other people to yell with you.” (Empty vessel syndrome)

Img. source: the register.co.uk

We all like to think that we are reasonable, educated, socially aware creatures and if we’re going to call ourselves that then we really ought to act like it. Let common sense and conscience guide you, apply critical thinking to things, question things, see if they make sense or they are backed by proof and evidence before you form an opinion, grab the pitchfork and brand and charge at somebody’s castle walls. You might just save yourself a whole lot of embarrassment and avoid the “Moron” label being plastered across your picture and name. That alone should make it worthwhile to you if for no other reason.

Proof and the burden of proof 

Burden of proof n. the requirement that the plaintiff (the party bringing a civil lawsuit) show by a “preponderance of evidence” or “weight of evidence” that all the facts necessary to win a judgment are presented and are probably true. In a criminal trial the burden of proof required of the prosecutor is to prove the guilt of the accused “beyond a reasonable doubt,” a much more difficult task. Unless there is a complete failure to present substantial evidence of a vital fact (usually called an “element of the cause of action”), the ultimate decision as to whether the plaintiff has met his/her burden of proof rests with the jury or the judge if there is no jury. However, the burden of proof is not always on the plaintiff. In some issues it may shift to the defendant if he/she raises a factual issue in defense, such as a claim that he/she was not the registered owner of the car that hit the plaintiff, so the defendant has the burden to prove that defense. If at the close of the plaintiff’s presentation he/she has not produced any evidence on a necessary fact (e.g. any evidence of damage) then the case may be dismissed without the defendant having to put on any evidence.

(Ref: https://dictionary.law.com/Default.aspx?selected=109)

Proof n. confirmation of a fact by evidence. In a trial, proof is what the trier of the fact (jury or judge without a jury) needs to become satisfied that there is “a preponderance of the evidence” in civil (non-criminal) cases and the defendant is guilty “beyond a reasonable doubt” in criminal prosecutions. However, each alleged fact must be proved separately, as must all the facts necessary to reach a judgment for the plaintiff (the person filing a lawsuit) or for the prosecution (the “people” or “state” represented by the prosecutor). The defendants in both civil suits and criminal trials need not provide absolute “proof” of non-responsibility in a civil case or innocence (in a criminal case), since the burden is on the plaintiff or prosecution to prove their cases (or prove the person guilty).

(Ref: https://dictionary.law.com/Default.aspx?selected=1642)

Even though these are the definitions drawn from a legal dictionary it doesn’t matter what situation you are applying them to, it doesn’t matter whether you are in an official Court of Law or in The Court of Public Opinion, if you present yourself with noting but a wild accusation you won’t achieve anything except annoying people, in a Court of Law, that will get you a contempt citation, in the Court of Public Opinion that will get you a general contempt.

Respect yourself when you want to make assertions, accusations or public statements… get the facts, get the truth, or truth’s (there’s always more than one side to every story) form your opinions and then get the evidence and proof to back them up before you shoot your mouth off or let your fingers do the talking without having the brain involved and just maybe we’ll be able to enjoy more of the TRUTH and less of the B.S.

Img source: ‘The X Files’
Production company(s)
Ten Thirteen Productions
20th Television (1993–1995)
20th Century Fox Television (1995–2002, 2016–2018)

Copyright TB/RVL 2018 (unless otherwise noted)

NB: Where used, quoted portions of other works are reproduced by permission, or under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, wherein allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.

This article may be linked to but may not be copied or reproduced, nor redistributed in any manner, including electronic without the express permission of the copyright owners.

The views and opinions presented in this article are the opinions of the author and/or contributors and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of The Owner/s of RVL, their officers, assigns or agents. RVL and its officers do not personally, individually, or jointly necessarily recommend or condone any of the activities or practices represented.

For further information please see the RVL Website Disclaimer

 

Mirror, mirror on the wall…

‘Metamorphosis of Narcissus’
~ Salvador Dali

Written, edited and presented by 

Tim

Everyone, or nearly everyone, will have heard or read the tale of Narcissus and Echo from Greek mythology… essentially,

“Narcissus, in Greek mythology, the son of the river god Cephissus and the nymph Liriope. He was distinguished for his beauty. According to Ovid’s Metamorphoses, Book III, Narcissus’s mother was told by the blind seer Tiresias that he would have a long life, provided he never recognized himself. However, his rejection of the love of the nymph Echo or (in an earlier version) of the young man Ameinias drew upon him the vengeance of the gods. He fell in love with his own reflection in the waters of a spring and pined away (or killed himself); the flower that bears his name sprang up where he died. The Greek traveler and geographer Pausanias, in Description of Greece, Book IX, said it was more likely that Narcissus, to console himself for the death of his beloved twin sister, his exact counterpart, sat gazing into the spring to recall her features.”[1]

As with many other tales of its kind there are different versions depending upon whom is doing the telling. It is a tragic tale to be sure but one that is not uncommon in its motif.

In modern parlance it gave us the word Narcissist, first recorded as being used somewhere between 1920 and 1930 it seems that it is a thoroughly contemporary word.

Narcissism, Narcissist and Narcissistic Personality Disorder are defined as;

Narcissism (noun [U])

Too much interest in and admiration for your own physical appearance and/or your own abilities

Narcissist (noun [C])

​Someone who has too much admiration for himself or herself

Narcissistic personality disorder (noun [C or U])  specialized.

​A personality disorder in which someone has too much admiration for himself or herself and too much concern with his or her own importance.

————————————————————

So, we make the transition from a tragic Greek myth to a modern reality that is as disturbing and destructive as anything else we face in modern society.

There is a splendid article available at Reach Out Recovery that deals with the 10 ways a narcissist takes control of people, it represents, in specific detail, the toxic effects a narcissist has on those around them and, more importantly, on the person they decide best suits their personal need or hunger.

It’s a word that is used frequently but not always in the proper context and it is important to define, and decide, when you are in the sphere of a true narcissist or just in the “fall out affected zone” of someone’s self-serving rhetoric.

Within our particular culture, as it is with all situations and social groupings in the world, we are exposed to some level of this toxicity every day that we are here, it’s no different than being exposed to it at school, in the workplace, in leisure activities or even, heavens forbid, in the home.

img. source: Freedom from Narcissistic and Emotional Abuse – Weebly

What can you do about it? Shield? Fight back? Run away? That’s a decision that each must make for themselves but one of the important things is that the most important thing in avoiding a trap is knowing of its existence.

Many of you will already, just in reading this, have had a name pop into your mind of someone you think is a narcissist… are they a real narcissist? Are they a common garden variety narcissist? Are they a dangerously enslaving type of narcissist? Are they suffering from a narcissistic personality disorder? They are difficult distinctions to make but the one thing that is certain, when you get hit by one you’ll know all about it.

Making yourself aware of the ways that a true narcissist works, the way they manipulate and manoeuvre is very important.

In 1930 Dion Fortune (a.k.a. Violet Mary Firth) published her seminal work “Psychic Self Defence”. This book came from her own experiences in her occult work. Fortune had witnessed various instances of “psychic attack” which she was called on to interrupt. Among the elements of a psychic attack, she noted, was “vampirism” that left the victim in a state of nervous exhaustion, and a wasting state. From this Fortune propounded an occult perspective on vampirism. She suggested that masters of the occult had the ability to separate their psychic self from their physical body and attach themselves to others and drain the host’s energy. Such persons would then begin to, unconsciously, drain the energy from those around them.

If you read this summary alongside the article on narcissism you will notice a great similarity between the two. That’s not to imply that ALL PsyVamps are narcissists – au contraire, I know some lovely non-narcissistic PsyVamps indeed… all I am suggesting is that perhaps there is some correlation between the two, some point where the two may overlap.

Img. source: Psych Central Professional

So, can narcissism lead to more serious things? Indeed it can…

For instance, in the article, “10 Ways Narcissists Take Control” (which actually comes under the heading of abuse) it is pointed out that narcissism can, and has, led to “Smearing and Stalking”, it describes how,

Toxic narcissists will slander you and report back to your loved ones, their loved ones, and anyone who will listen. They create stories that depict you as abusive and pretend they are the victims of your abuse.”

The author goes on to point out that,

A smear campaign sabotages your reputation and slanders your name so that you won’t have a support network to fall back on if you decide to detach and cut ties. A malignant narcissist may even stalk and harass you or the people you know as a way to “expose” the truth about you.

Either way you look at it rampant narcissism can lead, if unchecked, into criminal behaviour that threatens the safety and peace of mind of you, as the narcissist’s object, as well as those around you.

Detach and disassociate, remove yourself from the narcissist’s sphere of influence, warn others about the potential threat and, if necessary, don’t wait to get help with the situation. The true narcissist will attempt to isolate you, make you dependent on them and them feed off you in the most ugly and soul-destroying ways… and they never have to lay one finger on you.

Img. source: WikiHow
How to Handle Marriage to a Narcissist

There’s no need to get paranoid and start painting everyone around you as a narcissist, or a narcissist in training but just be aware if someone starts putting their unreasonable demands and pressures on you they might just be “making their move”…and not in a nice way either.

 

Copyright TB & RVL, 2018

  1. https://www.britannica.com/topic/Narcissus-Greek-mythology

Further Refs:

The Narcissist: Jekyll and Hyde

(https://freedomfromnarcissisticandemotionalabuse.weebly.com/)

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/

 

NB: Where used, quoted portions of other works are reproduced by permission, or under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, wherein allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.

This article may be linked to but may not be copied or reproduced, nor redistributed in any manner, including electronic without the express permission of the copyright owners.

The views and opinions presented in this article are the opinions of the author and/or contributors and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of The Owner/s of RVL, their officers, assigns or agents. RVL and its officers do not personally, individually, or jointly necessarily recommend or condone any of the activities or practices represented.

For further information please see the RVL Website Disclaimer

 

 

 

Crossroads 2018: Ageism or natural evolution?

“To state the facts frankly is not to despair the future nor indict the past.”
~ John F. Kennedy ~

Researched, Written, Edited and Presented by

Tim

PARENTAL ADVISORY: STRONG LANGUAGE AHEAD… Police those l’il eyes folks

Good evening,
I hope everyone is well, if not entirely happy…

Many of you may have seen, and read, the article “Ageism and the Greater Vampire Community” that was presented at the grumpyvamp.wordpress.com
There were several valid observations made in that article and while it may not accurately, nor entirely, reflect how the majority of the older members of the culture feel, that shouldn’t detract from it becoming a point of discussion, productive discussion even. Allow me to throw something else in here that might be of help in deciding whether to accept one point of view or the other of “Ageism”.

There are those who say that there are two things in life that are inevitable, “death and taxes”… I would suggest that should read “death, taxes and CHANGE”, change, no matter what your point of view, no matter what your politics, religion, sexual orientation, country of residence or philosophical leanings is, and always will be, inevitable.

The choice that faces every single person that has a brain and an ounce of intelligence is how to adapt and accept, or simply evade the change and hope it doesn’t take you down with it. In this particular “discussion” we have one point of view that relies on the role, the history, the struggles and fights, the achievements and successes of a particular generation of the modern Vampire culture to make a point and an opposing point of view that disregards such.

On the “disregard” side, or should we say, in the other “corner” we read the following comment, and I quote;

“Lmao. Fuck off, you stupid old bastard. The geriatric fucks like you that paved roads ten and twenty years ago still want to be worshiped as though you were fucking kings or something. Get over it. My generation will bury your asses, anyway.” (Excuse me but did he just threaten to kill me, or someone else? Or is the author just having a tantrum??? – Ed.)

I fail to see any saving grace whatsoever in that statement. It doesn’t seem to serve any purpose except, perhaps, to demonstrate that this particular “opponent” has nothing sensible or useful to say, doesn’t seem to care whether they embarrass themselves in public and also seems determined to destroy any shred of credibility they may be seeking to establish in this, or any other, culture.

Having said that, is there any validity to the “Youth against Age” point of view?

How many of you remember when you were fifteen, sixteen, seventeen and “running with your crew” in whatever home town you lived in?

How many of you remember the moment you became aware of the Real Vampire Culture and engaged in that for the first time?

How many of you recall the first House/ Order/ Court or Haven that you joined? And the “rules of conduct” that organisation had?

Do you recall what changes you, personally, went through between each of those events? The adjustments in thinking and acting that came with each?

What about when you got your first job, how did that go over?

Img. source: Nitty Griddy

“In the UK there is a strong youth politics movement, consisting primarily of the British Youth Council, the UK Youth Parliament and the Scottish Youth Parliament. In Africa the Program for Young Politicians in Africa (PYPA) all in good company with the Green Youth (Sweden) the Indian Youth Congress (India) the Communist Youth Movement and the Egypt Youth Party.” Young people actively engaging to learn about the role of politics and politicians in preparation for taking their places when the time comes.

In the Catholic Church, preparing for Priesthood takes a fairly long time as well, a time of learning and preparation. For example, “In the United States, priests must have a four-year university degree in philosophy plus an additional four to five years of graduate-level seminary formation in theology with a focus on Biblical research. A Master of Divinity is the most common degree.

In Scotland, there is a mandatory year of preparation before entering seminary for a year dedicated to spiritual formation, followed by several years of study.

In Europe, Australasia and North America, seminarians usually graduate with a Master of Divinity or a Master of Theology degree, which is a four-year professional degree (as opposed to a Master of Arts which is an academic degree). At least four years are to be in theological studies at the major seminary.

In Germany and Austria, priest candidates graduate with an academic degree (Magister theologiae, Diplom-Theologe, Master of Arts in Theology). The degree takes five years’ and is preceded by a year of spiritual formation (plus learning of the ancient languages) and followed by two years of pastoral practice (during which the candidate is ordained to the deaconate). Usually, priests spend all of that time in a seminary except one “free year”

Can you see the pattern here? Up and coming new and young leaders don’t just drop out of the sky all fully prepped, educated and with a firm grasp of the “reality” of the situation.

 

Anarchists, on the other hand, do simply drop out of… something and land running, they’re just not sure in which direction but they’re ready to fight, they’re just not certain against who, for a great and glorious cause that only they are privy to… they’re usually just not quite entirely sure what the cause is, or where it’s going.

You want to laugh now, go ahead, at fifteen I was an Anarchist so I’m speaking from experience.

Aretha Franklin 1967
img. source: Vogue Paris

Respect

(Redding)

“What you want, baby, I got

What you need, do you know I got it?

All I’m askin’

Is for a little respect when you come home…”

Aretha Franklin, 1967

Everybody has respect for something or for someone so it follows that everyone, except perhaps for the diehard Anarchist, knows what respect is. We get taught that from early childhood, mostly successfully, sometimes not. We go along through our early life and education being exposed to, and explained to, things like common courtesy, politeness and mutual respect then, at some point, some choose to forget all that, others choose to embrace it and make it part of the life. As a point of fact a learned friend of mine, a practicing Psychological Counsellor, explained to me that although we can treat everyone we come across with courtesy, respect and politeness we can’t, automatically, expect the same in return and, sadly, I find myself in agreement with that statement.

Some say respect has to be earned, they will tell you “I don’t respect people until they prove themselves worthy of my respect”F**K YOU C**K, who died and made you Emperor of the freakin’ Universe?

Some say, “To get respect you must show respect.” VERY sensible, that’s called mutual respect and it is how real, sensible and well-balanced individuals operate.

Others will say, “I don’t give a fuck whether you respect me or not…!”Fine BYE BYE…

Again, it’s all about choice.

 

img. source:
YSI South East Asia

Change and the next generation

When I became a father for the third time I realised that I couldn’t hope to look after my kids properly, while they grew, developed and strengthened by looking back on my own upbringing and applying the same rules as I held dear when I was running amok with the old crew. I realised that I had to move with the times, I had to update, I had to learn new things and accept new realities. I managed to navigate that and today I have three wonderful kids who are, respectively, an assistant manager, a shift manager and one who is studying youth and social work to work with “at risk” youth.

I supported, I guided and I nurtured their hopes and their dreams. That is what we “older Vamps” need to be doing now. REMEMBER death is not inevitable… even though there are those who claim immortality (sorry… it’s fiction) We will disappear sooner or later, later would be nice but how long are we going to try and keep an iron clad grip on the Culture? How long are we going to seek to stifle the “new young voices” that will follow in our footsteps? Is our legacy to be tottering, creaky and crumbling old establishment that will collapse into dust as soon as we’re not around to prop it up?

On the other hand, what are we looking at handing over to? This…???

“Lmao. Fuck off, you stupid old bastard. The geriatric fucks like you that paved roads ten and twenty years ago still want to be worshiped as though you were fucking kings or something. Get over it. My generation will bury your asses, anyway.”

“Now, now… here, this’ll make you feel better”
img. source: Vat19

I don’t know about you but after 16 years in the online culture and almost 39 years a real living Vampyre, that makes me shudder. Should we just close our eyes and walk away now and let the rabid dogs chew their own legs off? Should we just hand everything over to the young “fang bangers” now and say, “Screw you, you little tosser, ram it up your arse and fuck off…!”

As I said, it’s all about choices and to be quite honest, if the previous comment is indicative of the sort of thing we’re ALL up against now then I’m going to yell…

img. source: outtherecolorado.com… (and one of talented RVL artists…)

“LLAMA…LLAMA…LLAMA…LLAMA…LLAMA…LLAMA… I CAN”T HEAR YOU…!”

Then spit in the dust and go find something realistic and worthwhile to spend my time with. Oh, and I don’t need, OR WANT anyone to worship me by the way.

Copyright T.B. 2018

Refs:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Youth_politics#List_of_current_youth_politics_organizations

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Priesthood_in_the_Catholic_Church

https://www.songlyrics.com/aretha-franklin/respect-lyrics/

NB: Where used, quoted portions of other works are reproduced by permission, or under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, wherein allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.

This article may be linked to but may not be copied or reproduced, nor redistributed in any manner, including electronic without the express permission of the copyright owners.

The views and opinions presented in this article are the opinions of the author and/or contributors and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of The Owner/s of RVL, their officers, assigns or agents. RVL and its officers do not personally, individually, or jointly necessarily recommend or condone any of the activities or practices represented.

For further information please see the RVL Website Disclaimer