So, you want your own Empire? Part II


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In the first part of this mini-series, “So, you want your own Empire?” I visited some of the basics that I have concluded from years of organising, and leading, various groups, teams and task groups. That’s an important thing to keep in mind I think, I’m not “blowing smoke” here, I’m drawing on professional and non-professional experience to bring this here and none of it is cast in stone tablets. You can pick up texts on “Group and Team Building” everywhere, not to disparage book learning but don’t you think, in many things,  experience, success, and even failures, make better teachers?

Anyway, in this second part I am going to look at the second tier of group building.. mostly the planning and establishing that comes after the heady rush of the brilliant idea.


So, how’d you get on? Got a plan to go with your brilliant idea? Got some friends all hyped up? Got yourself a web-presence for your “Group”, your fledgling empire?

Now, what ya going to do with it?

Let’s assume, for the sake of the exercise, that you and four friends, tried and true, are in on the plan. Good. Let’s say you have set up “shop” and now you’re looking to attract general members to bolster the ranks, to give the “Empire” impetus and to take it from the “special interest” to the “Focus group” stage. Where are you going to look? What’s your hook? What are you going to offer that no one else does?

In a culture, an online community, where pretty much everything has been “done to death” (or so people would have you believe) what can you do to bring people to your magnificent creation?

Consider this, EVERYONE has to, had to, start someplace… hells bells even President #45 started with a couple of bucks and an idea sometime, do you really think that he is a better person than you? Think about it…

Pic. Credit –

The first consideration you need to make is what type of membership are you going to cater for? Is it going to be strictly “Rock collectors”? “Poetry Lovers”? “Sanguinarians”? “Psi-Vamps”? This is going to determine how you manage membership admissions. Are you going to include “supporters of”? Or, are you going to accept anyone whom has a general interest in the subject/s at your “empire”?

It is a vital part of the plan, at this stage, that you have a. a purpose, b. a plan and c. a method. For without these things you are going to end up with a Friday night crowd at a local bar scenario… general mayhem in other words.

PURPOSE: Make it clearly known, amongst your existing members and to prospective members what your purpose is. Don’t beat around the bush, tell them who you are, what you do and why you have this group. This will help in attracting potential members with “like minds” which is how your empire will become stronger. It’s because of the membership that, ultimately, a group will succeed or fail.

PLAN: How are you going to communicate with your members? How are you going to include your members in the aims and goals? Are you just going to issue newsletters created by an “Editorial Staff”? Are you going to create group created documents, books, pamphlets or some such thing? Are you going to hold simple “Topical” discussions? Are you going to have regular membership meetings?

All of these details need to be together, somehow, in an operational plan because the operational plan is how an organisation measures success and gauges what is benefiting the group as opposed to things which the group aren’t really interested in. You absolutely must, at all times, engage the maximum number of your members as possible. In this way you will find your members will be energised and will find the incentive to become truly and actively involved.

In this you will, hopefully, avoid the curse of the “Periodic membership interest poll/ post”, you will avoid having to send out group messages such as, “Hey, only 13 out of 200 members here lately, who doesn’t want to be a member anymore?

The method for administering the “empire” is a crucial step, and a very necessary tool that must be refined, retuned, coaxed along and reviewed regularly. Not everything you do will work, not everything you propose will be accepted, not everything you wish for will materialise… I still don’t have my $350,000,000 national lottery win in the bank despite all the wishing in the world…!

The “Method” can include such things as, regular staff meetings (chat or meetup) between the admins of the group to discuss how the group is going and/or how it could be improved. It can include putting out regular “newsletters” to the membership about the group and the activities of the group and/or its members – many people undertake benefit work that can inspire others to do similar and in general reflect well on your “empire” – let your general membership know about these things, congratulate your members on their achievements, it will make others want to achieve.

Encourage participation at every turn. Accept each member and acknowledge their strengths and the positives they bring to the group, in this way more members will be encouraged and feel empowered.

Or, just sit on your throne and wait for your members to flock to you and kneel at your feet to worship you… regret to advise but that won’t last too long. If you are going to hold yourself up as some kind of “go to” guy or gal you better get ready for a lot of razzing and a general lack of respect for your over inflated ego. Definitely a trap for young, or old, players.

Pic. credit –

Members, members, members…. Ahhhh yes, members… the people you are doing all this for, the lifeblood of your, and every other, group but how do you KNOW that the person who wants to join is actually going to be comfortable/productive or beneficial to your group?

This is where the first stage of membership planning comes in, the point where you decided whether you are building your group to be a helpful, supportive and vibrant resource for others or a closed society for you to gather only those who agree with you.
Don’t get me wrong here, either way is fine but you need to have some method of assessing membership applications.

Some organisations have lengthy “packages” where you have to answer a hundred questions about yourself, you have to demonstrate why you think you will be an asset and sign all sorts of “I agree to’s”… kinda like going for a new job.

Other groups employ “Recommendation Process”, that is, you can only get in if an existing member is willing to vouch for you.

Still others have come up with a “Three Step” approach, the three steps being,

Step 1. Firstly have the prospective member answer three simple questions such as why they want to be in the group, what do they hope to gain from the group and, perhaps more importantly, what will they be bringing to the group.

Step 2. Review their timeline if they have Facebook. Unless they have a private timeline you can see what they regularly post about, if it’s all about their myriad illnesses and how hard everything is that might raise a red flag, are they looking for a new audience? If they are obviously young and consistently posting about drugs, gangs, guns and Satan then you probably don’t want them in your group. Are they in 1438 other groups and have 3,290 friends? Then they are probably looking for another “Trophy” to hang on their wall for whatever reason and it is seriously doubtful whether they will be a consistent and beneficial member for you.

Step 3. Talk amongst yourselves. Set up a “Chat” that can be used only for communication about group matters between you and your co-owners/administrators. Compare notes, share your instincts and take a vote on whether you think they would be good for the group.

img. source: Parks Library Preservation on

So, let’s assume you have Purpose, Plan and Method all set and it all looks good on paper – that is after you have applied the K(eep) I(t) S(imple) S(illy) theory. On paper versus in reality… yeahhhhh…sometimes can be a problem, you need to stay flexible and responsive and the more complicated you make something the more time you are going to have to put into it, or the more staff you are going to need to run it… think major manufacturing plant versus ‘Mom-and-Pop’s Deli’.

However, let’s assume your empire has the sound foundations and it’s time to start receiving new members and guests. How do you know if someone is going to fit in with your group? Do you care? Do you think that variety is the spice of life? Do you want a ‘Friday night at the local bar’ scenario?

Most, if not all, the bigger and more successful Houses, Clans, Temples or Organisations have standards that they expect their members to adhere to and this needs to be addressed very early on, how do you want your members to behave? Are you among those whom believe that “Freedom of Speech regardless of consequence” is appropriate? Are you of the school of thought that “Common human decency and polite dignity” is the best way to conduct a group?

If you are of the former belief then, hey, all power…and good luck with that to ya, better get yourself some hard core moderators to keep watch over the crowd… get yourself some “bouncers”.

If you are of the latter school of thought then although you will still need moderators you will be well served by having some sort of pre-vetting method for potential members. I have known of several different methods, worked with a few, and I can’t really say with any assurance that one works better than the other. It all depends on what you feel comfortable with. I have known groups that simply admit members under the banner “Newbie”, “Acolyte”, “Seeker” or whatever other term might be seen as appropriate and then it becomes a probationary period situation where if said member gets three strikes or more in a given time frame – BOOM… bye bye.

I have seen “Membership Applications” ranging between one to twenty pages of statements, questions and affirmations. I have seen groups employ Twin Portals, one is the Main Group, or House and outside of that is another portal where potential full members serve out a specified period of time; a probation, before being accepted as a full member.

Yet others will admit a person then present them with a compendium of the Fifty Rules of House Horrorthon… and tell the newbie that if they break anyone of the rules they will boil in a large vat of communal ridicule before being ejected and having their name slandered all over Facebook.

Establish a common sense method that is to be applied across the board and use it no matter what the circumstances, no matter what. One of the worst errors that any House leadership can do is show favouritism, it alienates other members and then the cracks will start to appear.


So, to review,

State your Purpose

Have a Plan in place

Have an established operational Method

Have a Membership plan and requirements detailed.

These are the next stages that build on the foundations and give you the walls to protect, defend and support. Remember, a well-planned and well executed meal will ALWAYS be better than something thrown together and quickly boiled the crap out of…!!!

Copyright TB & RVL, 2018

NEXT: In Part 3, what sort of “Emperor” is your Empire going to have? Common Sense Leadership.


NB: Where used, quoted portions of other works are reproduced by permission, or under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, wherein allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.

This article may be linked to but may not be copied or reproduced, nor redistributed in any manner, including electronic without the express permission of the copyright owners.

The views and opinions presented in this article are the opinions of the author and/or contributors and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of The Owner/s of RVL, their officers, assigns or agents. RVL and its officers do not personally, individually, or jointly necessarily recommend or condone any of the activities or practices represented.

For further information please see the RVL Website Disclaimer


So, you want your own empire?

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In the editorial “Focus Pocus vs. Self-interest, which one’s better?” I introduced what I feel to be the top 5 considerations for forming a “group” that I have used and relied on for over two decades in business and private, those items were made in response to a question that was asked of me about what I felt were the five most important factors in forming a group. The important thing to remember, first off, is that it doesn’t matter what sort of group you are forming, it’s like there’s no difference between selling balloons and perfume, “selling” is “selling”.

Now, anyone reading this is going to be asking themselves, “What qualifies this writer to be saying all this stuff?”

Well, the short version is, he has been involved in, created, managed and facilitated “teams” for specific purposes in industry and commerce since 1985. He has been a hands on manager in the supply chain arena, a workshop scheduler and manager and an assistant to the G.M. in engineering and fabrication. He has studied and qualified in Business and has lead Occupational Health and Safety committees. Since coming to our wonderful and rambunctious cyber-world he has served as administrator and moderator in a number of organisational online presences and has been Owner/Facilitator of his own groups along the way. As far as RVL goes, since coming on board in early 2011 he has led the team that has seen our little e-zine grow from just a couple of hundred views a month in a handful of countries to having an audience of over 3,000 visits per month, regularly and being read in over 120 countries. That’s the short version and if that doesn’t cut it then I suggest you stop reading and go make a cuppa…!

The list for the “Hypothetical Group Project – Top 5 set-up requirements that I proposed read;

1) Balanced and co-ordinated “founder team”. It has been proven, in psychological and workplace studies that a “Focus Group” consisting of individuals of different strengths and specialties makes for the best mix of creation. The one thing that is important above all, each member of the team should, ideally, be in the project for the ‘right’ reasons.

2) Advertise. From day one, a presentation for public consumption. This will thwart the “rumour mill” and the “haters”.

3) Communicate. Create a webpage, not a group, where you can feed regular updates on progress and growth to “followers” and have them see, thus spread the word, that you are NOT hiding anything.

4) Appoint a spokesperson, 1 ONLY. All communications for public consumption should be made by that person only. Extra people, throwing in extra words may seem to be uncoordinated and will, even if unintentionally, provide ammunition to the “haters and critics”.

5) Maintain the flow, growth and development. Appoint more staff if you need to, assign specific tasks and goals to each. DON’T try and go it alone. Any delays will come across to followers as, “Yeah, well, not really THAT interested, just doin’ it for shit’s ‘n’ giggles really…”

So, let’s assume we have our group established, that’s a milestone indeed but the real work comes in now, how to grow, how to develop, how to mature the group into a long term, viable and respectable entity.

“Near Dark”, F/M & Near Dark Joint Venture, 1987.

It is necessary to realise that the visibility, popularity and reputation of the group leaders/owners will undoubtedly influence an initial acceptance or non-acceptance, in broader terms, of the group itself. This is inescapable and the harder one tries to, if necessary, counter the initial perceptions the bigger the problem will become and will create a diversion from the goal and purpose of the project.
You will probably experience an initial “rush” to join which can see your membership numbers reach what appears to be a very respectable number, however, if this “rush” doesn’t translate into involvement and interaction on a steady and continual basis you will find yourself sitting at the head of a list of names, and that’s all.

So, what’s the best way to get people to WANT to get involved?

This is something that’s going to be up to owners and their staff to guide, the staff of the group, the people running it have to realise two things; 1) Rome wasn’t built overnight and 2) You get out of it what you put in. Yeah, I know… two hackneyed and overused old phrases BUT that doesn’t make them untrue. Patience, in the early days, is going to be the key to getting what you want.

There’s another old saying that you’ll hear from time to time, usually reserved for optimistic commercial entities, “Build it and they will come”, unfortunately that’s only true of shopping malls and brothels… anything else needs to be displayed and in order to make that display effective you need “a hook”, you need something unique, something about your group project that no one else has. Better come to terms with the fact, from the get-go, people aren’t, wholesale, stupid and if there’s one thing they are in our modern Vampyre culture, they are spoiled for choice so you have to make your ‘jewel’ shine just a little brighter than the other folks’

The best idea, for promoting your group, is to have a two pronged approach. For this, and much as I do hate to admit it, Facebook is an ideal vehicle for multi-layer marketing, if you will. Create your group on Facebook where you have control over visibility and accessibility. The second step in the establishment, make a Facebook ‘page’, an entirely different thing to group. On the “Page” you can offer teasers, snippets, highlights, quick promos and pretty much any form of short and enticing tid-bit to get people coming to your group. A very good idea is to start with a Statement of Purpose, or Mission Statement.


Writing a Mission Statement is not just about saying, “We are a group of fluffy-toed green wiggles and we want to spread word about our great lifestyle as fluffy-toed green wiggles. We don’t want any DRAMA coz’ that upsets ALL fluffy-toed green wiggles and we don’t like being upset.”

Hmmmm…! Doesn’t really make it does it? Get together with your “founder team”, read the mission statements of some of the biggest and longest established Houses, Covens, Groups and Organisations and make practical use of the myriad examples available out there… don’t just cut and paste someone else’s mission statement… that’s gonna get you pegged as “just plain wrong” – be sincere, be succinct and put your idea out there cleanly and clearly.

Once you have the grand opening…

Things are gonna start off slow, that’s a given. It’s going to take time to attract people from there comfortable other 1367 groups… yeah? Don’t laugh just check on people who do come to you to join.

We call these folks “trophy club hunters”, it’s kinda like who can get the most groups. It is NOT humanly possible to keep up with notifications from 1367 groups so notifications get turned off, simple. Doesn’t do you any good though.

Let’s face it, you want people in your group who are going to find/create interest and who are going to generate activity in their interactions with the others in your group. If people are motivated they will start discussions, and I don’t mean just regurgitating old discussions ad nauseum, there’s plenty going on around and within the modern culture to provide food for thought for people and that, ultimately, will be one of the strongest draw cards of your group.

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Group members – The lifeblood

One of the things that is going to set your group apart from the others is its membership. Any group membership, regardless of its size, needs to be a well-balanced, interested and active membership. People with ideas, people with concepts, people with a little verve otherwise they are just going to sit there and say… well… nothing and that, ultimately, will see your group wither and die as so many others have done.

It is at this point you, and you co-founders, will need to decide how the hierarchy of you group will be set up. In this you have two choices, and here again, it comes back to “focus group” versus “special interest group”.

Consider, if you will, the following question; is your group a “democratic” establishment or an “autocracy”? That is, will you and your co-founders have an equal and equitable say in how the group runs and how the decisions are made for the group or, will your group be under your sole control as owner with your co-founders as administrators? There are equal pros and cons for both models and really, when all is said and done, it comes down to your personal style.

It is going to be very important that your potential members understand what sort of group it is because a set of rules is the one thing that separates an establishment from a rabble.

Img. source: louisdietvorst,

Looking forward, your group’s wider role and appeal

Once your group is off the ground you will be, I assume, deciding a couple of things; will your group be a small body, say you and ten of your closest like-minded friends, or will you be aiming for large membership and, hopefully, some recognition in the wider modern Vampire culture? It’s important that you know where you are going for without goals and aims a group simply founders.

In deciding the course for your fledgling group you may wish to consider establishing a presence with one of the “cooperatives” in play today.

It is here that you have, to my mind, three choices.
1) The Dark Nations, under the stewardship of the renowned Madam X of House of The Dreaming, is a “United Nations” style body that is made up of “Embassies” from different organisations within the modern culture. Each group that is granted membership (by application} maintains a representative embassy at Dark Nations aimed at promoting and facilitating relations between groups and organisations within the culture.

2) The Unity Project, led by King Maven Lore of The House of Lore New Orleans and Queen Gia Ahlia Bathory von Ecsed, Countess of Cachtrice and Queen of The Vampire Court of Memphis, is a unification project with similar aims that has established itself along, loosely, Monarchical lines where a collective of localised “Courts” are joined in a cooperative effort to achieve ongoing harmony and relations between “Courts” across the United States.

3) Independent House/Organisation, where the group/House or Organisation maintains an independent and active presence in the wider modern Vampyre culture.

I suppose it all rather depends, at the end of the day, whether you would rather call yourself Owner, Ambassador or King/Queen. Either way, again, it is by your choice that determines how you will guide your group in interacting with the wider culture.

Regarding Members

This is always, has always been and will always be one of the most difficult of decisions that any group leadership will face, what sort of people do you want in your group and again it comes down to “focus” versus “special interest”. A great deal has been made of the fact that group memberships, being made out of “people” in general, will be prone to all the pitfalls of having disparate ideas, differing ideologies and different philosophies… this is NOT a bad thing, it keeps discussions lively, it provides the widest range of opinion sharing and perception and can, very often, lead to unique and imaginative product, solutions and projects. Having said that however you really don’t want your group to become a seething mass of arguments and sniping… i.e. DRAMA

So, how to keep the “Drama Llama” in the barn?

One solution could be found in the following proposed “Membership Evaluation Framework”. This method has been developed based on the marvellous Bonewits’ Cult Evaluation Framework, developed by Isaac Bonewits, and provides a simple set of observable criteria by which any group owner could be able to determine whether a person is going to be suitable for their group… no, it’s not elitism, it’s common sense… you don’t elect a group of cattle to run a round up now do you?

Group Membership Evaluator

In conclusion

In essence, in forming any group for a purpose or objective, it is important that you establish a solid core of key members who are dedicated to seeing the group thrive and become what you want it to be. These people, including you, need to be willing to “get their hands dirty”. By that, you and your co-founders need to be able to effectively dedicate time to the project – time EACH WEEK, I would suggest a minimum of five hours per person.

You need to have a “hook”, something that is unique and desirable to members of the culture to make them want to get interested and involved in the group.

You need “quality” input… quantity, although it looks good on the surface, might be all potatoes and no meat and that isn’t going to cut it for very long before your group gets consigned to the “Ho Hum, seen it all before!” basket.

Remember, having a thousand members or followers looks good but if they’re not doing anything at all then you’re gonna be a King/Queen on a lonely throne, an ambassador without a tribe or a leader without followers in which case… why did you come here?

Copyright T & RVL 2018

NB: Where used, quoted portions of other works are reproduced by permission, or under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, wherein allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.

This article may be linked to but may not be copied or reproduced, nor redistributed in any manner, including electronic without the express permission of the copyright owners.

The views and opinions presented in this article are the opinions of the author and/or contributors and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of The Owner/s of RVL, their officers, assigns or agents. RVL and its officers do not personally, individually, or jointly necessarily recommend or condone any of the activities or practices represented.

For further information please see the RVL Website Disclaimer



Img. source: Loreto Day School

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“In the beginning there was darkness…” isn’t that how many things start?

In recalling beginnings I think back to the late seventies and early eighties, I think back on the first awareness and the first interaction with others. We didn’t call ourselves Vampires then, we were just us, a group of people who had one thing in common – similar tastes of a sanguine nature. We didn’t have computers, didn’t know what ‘internet was’, in point of fact I didn’t see computers on a regular work basis until ’85. We were just a group of friends who would hang out together at every opportunity.

We didn’t recruit, people found us. We didn’t advertise, we watched. We didn’t invite, we got asked. We were very wary of ‘outsiders’.

Obviously, now, it is a very different proposition. The internet explosion and the attendant growth in interpersonal communication across states, countries and continents and the globe has provided a rich source of exploration and a massive audience for everyone who can handle a keyboard and the prime opportunity for more came from the growth of social media.


Today, social media services users are numbered in the tens, hundreds and thousands of millions; a vastly larger sum of ‘audience’ than would ever have been dreamed of in the late seventies and early eighties and with the advent of, and burgeoning reliance on, social media comes a long sought after, by many, ability to ‘make friends’ and grab a share of ‘audience’ – pretty much all you need is a good hook, right? Or maybe not.

Let’s imagine for a moment that you get invited to a party, a party being held by someone you hardly know but they invite you anyway – sweet huh? Now, imagine they don’t tell you but they tell pretty much everyone else you’re going so that everybody will think that you are die-hard friends with them and because you have a lot of friends, suddenly, everybody wants to be at the party. How do you feel when you find out that YOU are the hook?

This is a practice that has become rampant on social media platforms, people create groups and randomly add people to that group by ‘farming’ other people’s friends lists. They seek to build not only their own credibility but also the numbers of their group, and presumably ‘personal friends’ lists without ever actually ASKING people whether they want to be involved or not. From there it’s not such a stretch to find yourself connected with hate groups, derogatory homophobic, ethno-phobic or other groups with extreme, and often unpleasant, views and practices.

How many of you have been the subject of such ‘friend fishing’ practices and how do you feel when it happens?

The modern living Vampyre subculture is perhaps one of the most fertile of grounds for this to occur and when people have hundreds, or thousands, of ‘friends’ it is virtually impossible to keep track of everyone and everything that is going on all the time… I’d hazard a guess that if you kept open ‘notifications’ you would need all of your waking hours, outside of working, eating and sleeping alone, to keep track on even five or ten percent of what’s going on. In short, and in all likelihood, you won’t even know when you have been ‘added’ to someone’s pet group or ‘party’ and this, in its turn, can get you a reputation of a very different kind than the one you hope, and intend, to portray.

In recent conversation on this very subject the views of the people holding discussion seemed to be very clear on the matter. There was a universal condemnation for the practice of the random add. As for the people who ‘add’ others to their group projects without seeking consent or even advising that they have done so seems to be the height of bad manners online, a gross breach of ‘netiquette’. The proper practice, naturally, would be to make contact with a prospective member and actually show them a little respect in giving them the courtesy of choosing whether or not they wish to subscribe to your group, or ‘party’. This is intrinsic in building your own solid and respected reputation thereby getting people to want to come to your group. The flip-side of the coin is that if you are found to be randomly adding to your group from the ‘friends of friends’, and ‘friends’ lists of others you will quickly gain a bad reputation until no one but the ‘bad guys’ will touch you or your ideas. As you can see, in effect, by randomly adding people without thought or consent a person is actually eroding their own standing, credibility and reputation until they become labelled ‘troll’, or worse. Why would anyone even think of doing that to themselves?

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So, how does the social media user prevent being ‘randomly added’ to groups? In short, as long as you are on some sort of ‘friend list’ it appears that you can’t for that pretty much flies in the face of the concept of ‘social media’ but what you can do is, say once or twice a week, check your groups lists, see where you are, see what you’ve been added to and then squeeze out a little time to look over the group page and see what sorts of things are being posted there. You may, dear reader, suddenly find yourself seen to be supporting something that goes against everything you believe and, let’s face it, while appearances may be deceiving in real life, in social media life, appearances can, often, be everything.

How does one start a group?

There are, of course, many ways to begin your own “Vampire/Vamp-Otherkin” group – aside from simply starting it and robbing people’s friends lists. The best way is to discover whether you have friends who are of the same mind as yourself, seek their input, ask them if they want to be in a group and make it so. Generally, the sort of friends I’m talking of are those you have been in another group with for a time, people whom you have conversed with and with whom you have a genuine; if only online, rapport with. This means that your group is going to start of small but hey, Rome wasn’t built in a day right?

From there your friend list can, and will, grow as others come seeking to join your group once you and your friends “advertise” its existence. You may wish to try and invite people, people not on your friends list and to this end a polite invitation message is the best way to achieve a good response. Even if the response to membership is not affirmative the people you treat with respect will remember it and they will respect you for having taken that route. In this way you will build a good and positive reputation for you and for your group.

In a recent conversation on this matter, in general, opinions were quite firmly in the “respect” category…

MP: I think anyone who just randomly adds people has no pride in themselves, their path or in the company they keep! It’s a popularity contest to them and that invalidates their legitimacy or how seriously they should be taken. JMHO….

TB: …let us suppose though, as is usually the case, these new “leaders” simply add the most notable people from amongst individual friends lists in order to make their fledgling group appear high profile, noteworthy and credible… sort of a practice of, import quantity AND quality, even if they don’t know they’ve been added…

How would your opinion form about that group and its leader dear lady?

MP: I think if you add anyone without their permission then you are disrespecting that person and taking away their free will and right to choose whether or not to be a part of anything.

These people are also more likely to leave any group that takes it upon itself to simply add them without asking them beforehand.

SL: I have a few of those type FB associates who randomly add me to their groups. I frankly think the practice is rude. Then you have the other type that apply to every group suggestion given them and send random friend requests without so much as a note. Guess I am old fashioned but if you’re going to knock on my door at least have an explanation.

DL: Facebook farming. That’s precisely why I rarely accept any requests from strangers with two dozen VC as “common friends” anymore.

I’m not a vampire trading card.

MB: Exactly…. Here’s another fly in the ointment. How would you feel if your name was used in the groups description … you being a rather high profile person in the VC and you are not even a part of that group. It would, in my mind, make other people think that I was completely on board with this group and the views and opinions that they were posting about. It would, also, make people who would normally not bother joining the group, think that if so and so’s name is being used … this must be a great group to be a part of. Using deceit to gain members is, to me, an unethical practice.

JH: Not only for the vampire themed groups but for groups in general, I think that these leaders who pose questions and only want responses from their “favorites” are a sham.

I understand that there are “trolls” and people looking for a hookup or date while in these groups, but sometimes one mustn’t take things too seriously. For instance, if you pose a question to whether or not there is a correlation between vampires and sexual attractiveness. You’re opening the floor to some lewd responses. If that question is posed by a female and a male responds to it, even if in jest, then he had better be an admin or a very close friend. If you pose a question such as “Are those walk around in heavy makeup sporting fangs an abhoration to the vampire life?” Its a question that only the “In Crowd” of those groups can answer because anyone else who responds is frowned upon and may find themselves booted and blocked. These very same people whom they have invited from their friend’s list of friends. Draw them in, make them feel all comfortable and the first they do, if they get an undesirable comment, boot them out, ban them and spread their names across the related groups citing them as “bad people”. My thing is this, don’t go fishing for members, don’t pose a question and when those netted members give them an opinion, be ready to crucify them,

TB: Thank you for the comments my friends. It is interesting, I think, that we all seem to hold similar views in this respect and one has to wonder – NOT calling myself old fashioned or anything – whatever happened to good manners?

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For all those reading this…

Might I suggest that you take a look at your ‘Groups’ list, you never quite know where you’ve ended up, unless you have your Facebook security settings screwed down hard perhaps.

To those who have, will, or might consider starting up your own group by random adding people from friends, or friends-of-friends lists… one simple piece of logical advice, DON’T. Your reputation will sink like a brick, your group will sink like a brick and your ‘Friends’ list may suffer an earthquake.

Manners aren’t just things you have at the dinner table, and respect is not only for other people but for yourself as well.



Clan Resurrectus Homepage discussion, March 31, 2017 (used by permission)

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